Everyone knows the term “Senioritis,” referring to the idea that once 12th graders near the end of their required education, they lose motivation and slack off. They sit back, party, and count down the days until graduation.
Senioritis has hit the boys and me in our home and Horatio in foreign lands. The difference, though, between the happy 18 year olds and us, besides the 20 odd years, is that we cannot slack off. If we decided not to put forth our full efforts, child services might come calling or you might view an unforeseen international incident on CNN.
So, the inability to slack off, the weariness setting in, the tasks continuing to mount, all led to one thing: crankiness.
It’s unavoidable. So what, we have a mere 58 days left until the deployment ends… that’s still fifty-eight days of living apart; trudging through our days, knowing it should be different, listening to outsiders tell us that we are, “almost there,” that they know what it’s like because their spouse spent two weeks in England last year.
After about two weeks of steady decline into utter irritability, I sat down to chat with a good friend. Her words set me straight and I wasted no time before I shared them with Horatio, as well.
She complimented me on having made it this far with a positive attitude and a smile on my face. She put it bluntly. “Don’t blow it now.” She warned me not to let my kids down by ending the nearly two year ordeal with a bad attitude.
I’d been wallowing in the muck of my misery but she ‘fixed me right up,’ as the saying goes.
I’m so grateful to her because I know, as well as anyone, it’s all about the attitude, but I’d temporarily forgotten it. We can’t change the situation in which we find ourselves, but we can change how we handle it. We can decide: positive or negative, good or bad. It’s entirely up to us. These are words I consistently live by and I had let the black cloud of my present position block out my usually sunny outlook.
So what if I have to do all the dishes, all the laundry, all the yard work, (yes, I’m mentioning the yard work again- you are probably sick of hearing about it, but not as sick as I am of doing it!), all the driving around, all the school meetings, all the errands, all the parenting (including sleepless nights trying to get the four year old to stay in his own bed), all the paperwork, bill paying, summer planning… etc. In the scheme of things, it’s not that big of a deal. Thank G-d, we are all healthy, comfortable, and relatively happy. There are a lot of terrible things going on in some people’s lives… we’ve got it pretty good.
So, thanks to Jennifer, I am back on track and so is Horatio. I think we can keep DFS and CNN at bay for the next two months.