It’s all in how you look at it.

It feels like everyone asks me how I do it. By “it,” they mean staying at home with four boys while my husband is away for 18+ months.

I realize it’s a lot to deal with and I won’t pretend it is easy, but I keep it in perspective. Everyone has something they deal with. I have my things, my neighbors have their things, the person I sit next to at a PTA meeting has her thing, the barista at Starbucks has his thing, etc.

Sure, some days are very long and some days are overwhelming, but when I get tired and frustrated, all I have to do is remind myself that someone else has much bigger things to deal with and I wrap up my pity party.

My kids are pretty healthy, happy- other than missing their Dad, and secure.  My husband has a job, which is more than many Americans can say these days.  Even caring for a child with Autism, which definitely has its challenges, is nothing compared to what many other families deal with every day.

When another mom at one of the boys’ schools says I am strong, that she’d never be able to do “it,” I don’t really understand that mindset.  What should I do?  Collapse in a heap of tears?  Curl up in a ball?  My kids need me.  I have to put dinner on the table, make the lunches, fold the laundry (eventually).  It is all a lot easier to do with a positive outlook.

I’m a Navy Wife.  We are, generally, a strong breed, each in our own way.  We are a blue star family, we have a husband and father serving our country.  It is an honor and a privilege to be in the role of Navy Wife.  I don’t take it lightly and am glad to do it.  Even at my lowest moments, I wouldn’t change it.

People often tell me to thank my husband for his service, and sometimes they thank me for mine.  I have a great husband and great kids and we live in the best country in the world.  My husband does his job so that we (and you) can keep it this way.

I have “it” pretty good.

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About Commander in Chief At home

Erin is a military spouse and, sometimes temporarily single mom to 4 boys. She's a parenting coach, writer, teacher, special needs (Autism) mom, and much more.
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4 Responses to It’s all in how you look at it.

  1. Teresa says:

    Just found your blog through the Manic Mommies and I’m reading through your older posts. I’m a Navy wife too and I love your attitude. I’m a pretty positive person too and I totally agree with your perspective.

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  2. Thanks, Teresa. It’s easier to stay positive, than to curl up in a ball and feels sorry for ourselves, right?
    Hang in there!

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  3. I LOVE this post. I am Navy wife too, and yes it can be exhausting at times. We have two sons, (one who we are in the process of having evaluated to see if he is on the Autism spectrum), but every day I count my blessings. I don’t like to be around the Navy wives who want to complain all the time about how hard life is – it’s just a downer, and I can’t stand the negativity. Us positive gals gotta stick together. Hang in there!

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