Horatio is packing now. The departure is quickly approaching, like a dark tunnel ahead.
It is nice to have him home, though. He took a few weeks off before he leaves. If you haven’t been through a separation like this, it will be very hard to understand the tangle of emotions that forms.
Many couples bicker a lot in the weeks leading up to a service member’s departure. I anticipated this and expected it, but we’ve actually avoided it, for the most part, which is nice.
I had to laugh, though, when Horatio, who has been more helpful around the house than he normally is, said, “you’ve had it pretty good lately. I’ve been doing a lot.” I nearly snapped back about how it’s nice, but doesn’t exactly make up for the two years that lie ahead of us, when I’ll be doing EVERYTHING around the house. Instead, though, I closed my mouth for a second, appreciated the work he has been doing, and just said, “thank you.” Conflict averted.
There are boxes and bins all over the house. It definitely feels like a move is coming. While it is hard to deal with, I remind myself frequently that if we were all moving right now, it would be much worse and much more stressful.
So, I try to help him prepare, logistically and emotionally. I help the kids deal with the coming departure and that is pretty much what gets me through it. I focus on everyone else. It’s the way I roll.